Happy new month everybody, I have really missed blogging oh, infact I have been reading other blogs but too lazy to update mine. I have a lot going on in my life right now and sometimes I feel like putting my emotions in words but am just too scared cause then I feel like I have been exposed, and been a very private person I find it really hard to open up to people, even people that I thought I was close to, I cannot seem to open up to them.
One of my major problems is trusting people, I have so many people I could call and talk to but one experience had me so scared that I dont think I can ever trust anybody other than members of my family. am so thankful to God for my hubby he has been a very good support system for me, I have not spoken to my four of my close friends in two and the half months, not that am angry with them or that they have done something to me, I just have not been feeling connected to them at all and I feel horrible about it, I did send them emails explaining what I was feeling and am glad they understood and kinda gave me some space, now I feel like am ready to reconnect with them, and am feeling I have been selfish and don't deserve their friendship. I honestly don't know how to go about it. on a more happier note my mum is coming to visit in a months time and am super excited for her to be here, although my dad is having a hard time letting her go since she will be here for xmas, I don't know maybe I should surprise him with a ticket right before christmas. I feel so good after writing my feelings down, hope I didn't bore you guys with my thoughts.
May the month of september be a blessing to us in Jesus name Amen.
You have not bored me oh :)))
ReplyDeleteYou should post more often
I started blogging because I'm not very good at 'idle chat' and blogging is a good way to 'unburden'
I read your comment on Ibhade (Nitty Gritty) and I could tell you were really upset.
To be honest, I do think you come as a very nice person - perhaps too nice. The truth is nice people are often taken advantage off.
I used to care what people thought of me ....until I realised that no matter what one does, they will find something to complain about. Now, I only care what my kids, hubby and my God thinks of me. Other people dont matter.
Regarding your friends, there is a saying 'twenty children cannot remain friends for twenty years'...............We outgrow friends and we reconnect with some forgotten friends. It's all part of life. Your true friends will always stay your friends.
Dont be so hard on yourself. Do your best one day at a time and you'll be fine.
xxxxxx
Happy new month to you also & amen!
ReplyDeletetotally agree with you 9jamum....esp caring about what people thought of me...
Simply do you, my sister, take care.
@Nil: Thank you for you comments and words of encouragement,
ReplyDelete@Ibhade; Thank you ma'am I also agree with her ; )
It's nice to read from you again. Friendship is a complex thing, I've also been struggling on that front since I moved to the US. As for your mum coming, I'm excited with you too. Hope you blog more often.
ReplyDelete@myne; thanks for stopping by, I tell ya its nt easy to maintain long distance friendships, but am happy that things r looking up. yup am supper excited for her to come I have already started day dreaming about all I will get to enjoy ;)
ReplyDeleteAmen! may it be a good month for you as well. I am glad you have understanding friends that care and love you.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a child I put so much emphasis in my friends, and their opinions. It was normal- As children, we want to spend so much time with our friends, and we want our relationship with them to grow. It is a good thing because once that relationship is established you don't have to put in so much effort. As an adult, it is normal for you to not feel as connected to some of your friends, partly because your life is now occupied with more things than the playground or the next neighborhood party and so on. It is normal to not be connected for a short while, and I am glad your friends understand. If you note however that it is going for longer periods then maybe you ought to rethink that particular relationship. Maybe it is not a great friendship to begin with. I enjoyed the read ~remain blessed